Wednesday I went to a new doctor to get a second opinion. I think at first he thought my pain was psychosomatic! I'm really so healthy in every other way - great labs, great bone density, good muscle strength, etc. I shouldn't have a bone injury - and I was referred by a psychologist!
One of my friends at work is a child psychologist and I put her name down as a referral - only because I wanted to give her credit for sending the doctor (an old friend of hers) business, and maybe get some preferential treatment (hey, I'll take all the special favors I can get). I had to explain that it was a personal referral, not a professional one!
But any question of psychosomatics was dispelled by an x-ray: the back of my femur is again showing calcified build-up and edema. It's probably a severe stress reaction or multiple stress fractures (the area is about 2" long!).
The theories:
1. I didn't allow it to heal enough the first time, and stress distributed to adjacent bone when the site of the original fracture was stressed.
2. The first fracture healed, but I have some anatomical/gait anomaly that caused it to almost immediately occur again.
If it's #1, shame on me, I'm a bad runner.
If it's #2, I'm done with running. And the only way to find out is to rehab it and try again.
So, I'm doing a two-pronged approach: I'm completing calcitonin therapy to speed healing of the bone in case it's scenario #1, and I'm doing PT to strengthen auxiliary muscles and stretch tight hamstrings and adductors in case it's scenario #2.
If neither works I'm out of here. I'm just tired of being in pain all the time and ready to feel whole again.
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I know I've said it before, but I do think you've pushed your injury comebacks too quickly...I KNOW it sucks, trust me, I do. But maybe a really, truly conservative approach can help you get healthy for good. (don't kill the messenger!)
ReplyDeleteUgh, this really sucks. But it is good to have an answer finally. And I agree that you should try again! It seems weird that you used to be able to run so well on it... so it probably is just that you came back a little fast. Im sooooo hoping thats it; I want you to be a runner!! xo ~ Penny
ReplyDeleteUghhhh.... On the other hand, you *sort of* have an answer. Or at least the path to an answer. I hope it's the one you WANT to hear, but at least it sounds like you're prepared to deal with either possibility.
ReplyDeleteI have to think that its #1, just give you body more time to recover and you will be back.
ReplyDeleteI am glad you got a diagnosis and know what is going on. Rehab smart, be patient, and EASE back into running and I bet you will be just fine. I tend to be very "all or nothing" so this "running lower mileage and not doing any fast running" is killing me, but at least I am running and healing. Hang in there!
ReplyDeleteHoping the best for you. That just really sucks. :(
ReplyDeleteI'm soooooo glad Ms. Z said that above. #1 because I've found that 100% of the time, she's right 100% of the time. #2 because I never wanted to say it before, but now seems like a good time - I also thought you tried to run too much too soon and race too fast when you were on the recovery. You are a GREAT runner. But dang girl - you were killing it just a few weeks after you returned. I'm gonna be disappointed if you give up running. In fact I think you shouldn't. I think you just need good quality time healing properly. But I understand not wanting to live in pain. The fantastic (sarcasm) drawing of the xray alone was enough to turn my stomach and make me wanna quit. It's a tough decision to make, but I'm sure you'll do the right thing. Okay, there was my "dad" speech for you.
ReplyDeleteHa, a child psychologist referral! I am so sorry about the injury, but I'm glad you have a proper diagnosis. Hang in there and please take the recovery easy easy easy (there is no such thing as too easy when it comes to this)!
ReplyDeleteGrace
When I first read your post title, I thought you were going to write about how another doc told you that there was nothing wrong with you (as I recall, that's where you were a few posts ago). Thus, this actually seems like GOOD news - it's an answer as to why you're hurting!!
ReplyDeleteI haven't hung around these parts that long, but in my experience, there are very few people who "aren't built for running", when "running" is done slowly, carefully, and progressively. So give it a shot. If it's in your budget, it might even be worthwhile to work with a coach (I don't mean me, this is NOT self-promotion - it's my honest opinion), when you're cleared to return to activity - someone who can see the bigger picture, help you see it, and keep you accountable to a slow and progressive return. Good luck!!
I had a friend go in for a thryoid issue and came out with a prescription for an anti-depressant (she threw it away)...I swear it's ridiculous what goes through some doctors heads (you'd know more than anyone!). I'm sorry about the injury. Though I don't know if #1 is the culprit, I do know that muscle imbalances are 90% of what causes running injuries - so that may have initially been the problem. It took me a very long time of (trying) to be patient to learn a whole new foot strike and work on weak abductors to make my foot injury go away. Good luck with it all....try to stay positive!
ReplyDeleteI'm just sitting here thinking "Crap" on your behalf. :(
ReplyDeleteI am hoping both of us have medical miracles that leave us in perfect running health :)
Here's to hoping it is 1. And that all you need is more rest for longer....and that maybe Jim is again right... Maybe you did too much too fast...that is my number 1 fear right now...I try to be very cautious....more rest days.... The one thing I am not good at is the PT and reading your story is reminding me that I need to be better. Thinking of you my friend.
ReplyDeleteI hope it's number one... I hope an extended period of rest and PT will make all the difference in the world. I know that not running/being active is awful.. I know this because I have not run in 5 months and 13 days. It's awful. But if it means you can come back to running some day when you are healed, I think the rest is worth it (that is what I am telling myself).
ReplyDeleteBoo! I don't like either options. But, I don't see you being off the streets/track permanently - surely this isn't *that* kind of injury! It's tough to sit on the sidelines but be smart!
ReplyDelete