Happy Mother's Day!

Happy Mother's Day to all the moms out there!

And I am so thankful I'm NOT a mom. I say that because this week we volunteered to babysit the two little horrors that are our nephews.

Someone's going to say it eventually, so it might as well be me. Those two are brats. They're almost three and almost two, and they...
- Demand rather than ask politely
- Spit at the table
- Bite
- Never share
- Disobey
- In fact, disregard adult input entirely
- Scream when they do not get their way
- Pull hair

Now, I know some of this behavior is expected from two year olds. And I hate to be the childless adult giving my expert opinion. But I did have six younger brothers, and I did basically raise them (with the help of my saintly sister, thank you Melissa), and this kind of behavior consistently is called being a brat.

Every time one child picked up a toy, the other would snatch it from him, usually accompanied by a punch or bite.
Dinner was a spit-fest.
One of them bit me when I said they needed to say "please" when they asked for something.
The other tackled David, pulled his hair, and gouged his eyes for no reason.
When it was time to go home from the park, the three year old refused, argued, shouted ("I said NO! Shut up! I'm not going home!") and the two year old lay on the ground with arched back and screamed for 5 minutes.

I would write this off as parental separation anxiety/testing authority of other adults/tired, sick, or teething, but the behavior doesn't stop. When dad came to pick them up, they ran over to hug him - followed by bites, punches, and fighting. Needless to say, he did not correct them. In fact, he laughs it off. "Oh, it doesn't hurt, they're so little."
The kids struggle to know the rules because:
- Their parents don't agree on the rules
- The kids are not on a schedule of any kind
- Thus bedtime is "whenever they fall asleep" (you can imagine how well this works out)
- Their diet is extremely poor, almost entirely white flour/white sugar based, little protein and no fresh fruits or veggies
- Eating has become a big battle - forcing them to eat, arguing over it, throwing food (the astonishing thing is that they are being forced to eat fast food hamburgers, mini powdered donuts, Little Debbies, and potato chips!)
- They spend certain days of the week with different relatives as babysitters (including overnights), so in one week they will have their parents, both sets of grandparents, a great-aunt, and an aunt - all with various rules.

Today at Mother's Day lunch I saw a 10 minute fight over a bib that ended with the three year old victorious - multiple times. See, mom kept giving in: "Ok, no bib, but then you have to wear your old shirt." "Ok, no old shirt, but then you have to wear no shirt." etc. Little baby won each battle, then won the war by getting his original way - eating with his church clothes on - and purposefully smearing berries all over them.

I don't know what the point of this post is. I guess it serves as a happy mothers day to all of you, because even if you suck at being a mom you must be doing a better job than this. Ha, kidding.

No seriously, I have no point to this post. Just venting.