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Wednesday, June 25, 2014

The torture device I sleep in

At night, I lock myself into a CPM, or continuous passive motion machine, and set the timer for 4 hours. I plop an ice pack on my hip, and go to sleep.

The CPM makes a whirring sound as it cranks my leg from 0 to x degrees - "x" started at 45 degrees, and my doctor has me going up by 5 degrees a night until I'm at 90. I do not recommend enjoying the plush comfort of the CPM machine in the summer, as its fake fur lining reaches about 180 degrees F by midnight. Luckily, my body temperature stays pretty average, as my groin is being concurrently frozen off by the direct application of ice.

When the machine turns off, I wake up. Then I start the long, complicated process of extricating my leg, finding my crutches in the dark, crawling/falling over my husband or my CPM machine (depending on which side of the bed I choose to get out of), and crashing into the bathroom to throw my melted icepack into the sink.

When I get back in bed, having completely ruined my husband's night, I roll onto my stomach for the 2 to 3 hours of recommended tummy time. I'm supposed to lie on my stomach to gently stretch the hip flexors.

It's so fun. You wouldn't believe the wonders my sleeping habits are doing for our marriage.


9 comments:

  1. Ohhhhh that sucks, but your description of averaging out body temp made me laugh. Hang in there!

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  2. That looks very similar to what I had to use when I had my knee surgery. So uncomfortable :( Heal fast!!

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  3. Oh my goodness, your sleep is worse than mine right now!!!! How much longer in that thing!? You're such a good sport about it, though. Hold on to that sense of humor!

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  4. Oh--my husband had that last year after having his knee replaced. It is no fun, to be sure. But it will do you lots of good so it's all worth it!

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  5. I can't believe your husband's still trying to sleep there with you. Mine would have departed for the couch after just a few hours.

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  6. OH my girl! Where have I been? I leave blog land and I come back to you like this?! I love the way you can roll with all of this. Oh, and side topic...I love the fireplace next to your bed.

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  7. That sounds sooo relaxing. I get irritated with Michael when she flips over more than twice at night. I think I'll be sleeping upstairs if she ever comes home with one of those. And fyi, that light is still shining right in my face.

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  8. Pretty sure I read this post before going to sleep last night and I dreamed that I had to wear a leg brace...oops? I don't know how you sleep in that...I can only imagine the sleepless nights it must cause for both of you!

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