Lame in the slang of a decade ago, because lately I've been so swamped with work that I can barely surface for long enough to make dinner, let alone write a two-paragraph post. But also lame because....I'm actually lame.
I'm coming clean. Running isn't going well. I have continued to feel a strange tightness or pain in the backs of my thighs. I didn't run much at all this summer, and it was due to a combination of intermittent pain and far too much work. When I have run, I've been perplexed by a nagging pain. So today marks three weeks off of running, because I learned last time that if pain won't go away, you must rest the injury!
But. In all seriousness, I'm about done with running. I can't pursue an activity that leaves me in pain most of the time. I went back to see my doctor and he basically told me I was a hypochondriac - that I'm fine. But I'm not fine! I definitely feel a pain in the femur! And if this continues, I'm finding a new hobby.
I've been injured for over a year now (on and off) and I can't even imagine being uninjured for a long stretch of time - certainly not enough for me to plan a race. I'm leaning towards picking up a new sport. It's kind of sad, because I was kind of good at running (for a generally un-athletic, sedentary person). But it's getting less and less sad as injured time goes by. At this point I'm just tired of being in pain and ready to move on to something that keeps me active and healthy without the downtime.
Last year, I'd never have said that. I love running! This year, I'm willing to give it up to have nights when aching thighs don't wake me up at midnight. I'm debating keeping the blog or not - if I miraculously heal up and stay healthy, that's one thing; if this is going to be long-term, chronic, or debilitating, there's no point. I am also considering seeing another doctor for a second opinion. So, it's up in the air.
Any suggestions for a new sport? Part of me wants to take ballet or a martial art.
Feel ya. I think everyone in my real life would be shocked to know how often I think about what it would be like to "pack it up" and find a different athletic hobby (mostly due to the general wear-and-tear, my lower back/hips/glutes/hamstrings saga, my ever-increasing bunions...). I love, love, love it and am not cripplingly lame at the moment, but the thought of pursuing something a little less demanding and more sustainable to the body is definitely on my mind. It's too hard for me to approach it with moderation and say, "I'll just run less! I'll focus on 5Ks instead of marathons!" etc.
ReplyDeleteBallet might not be so good on the bunions, but you do already look graceful and ballerina-ish, so maybe you'd be a natural.
Are you looking for something endurancey and "repetitive-meditative" (e.g. swimming, rowing, cycling), or for something that involves more skill acquisition and honing of techniques (team sports, martial arts, dance)? The former might give you an easier parallel to what you liked about running, but the latter might provide a satisfying new perspective...
You bring up all kinds of questions that I obviously should have thought of before. I think I want something that can be done alone if necessary - I don't mind taking a class to learn a skill, but I don't want to have to attend a group thing every time. But I also wouldn't mind doing a little of each: swimming by myself; karate class once a week. That sort of thing.
DeleteOh man, this must be so frustrating. I'm sure the lame-lame goes hand in hand. It's hard to write about something that isn't going well or going at all.
ReplyDeleteOh my goodness, I nearly CRIED reading this post. Running is so near and dear to me. I can tell from your previous posts that running has also brought you LOTS of happiness.
ReplyDeleteI would definitely seek a 2nd opinion. Hypochondriac? Give me a break! That is really unprofessional!
And yes, there are lots of other great sports to try. How would you feel about triathlons? You could possibly still run enough to get through that portion of the race, still sort of be in the running community, but also have the biking and swimming training.
Hang tough, girl. You'll figure it out!
Oh no! I'm so sorry. You sound like you are right to look for a new sport, running may be a thing of the past. Got to be cycling then.
ReplyDeleteI definitely can relate. It is hard, frustrating, sad, annoying... Just UGH. I want to row but it's so freaking expensive...and it hurts but not as much as running. It'd be good to figure out what is up with your thighs. Hmmmm... is the pain/tightness across the whole backs of your thighs? Mostly at the top by the butt? At the bottom by the knee? Does it hurt all the time? Do certain movements aggravate it more than others?
ReplyDeleteIt hurts all the time, but it's worse at night or after activity: running, squats, standing all day at work, etc. The pain is mid-thigh. Before it was lower thigh. It's never upper thigh or hip. Sometimes I feel pain at the front of the leg, too, over the knee, mostly if the leg is unsupported (ie, I'm sitting down and my thigh extends over the edge of the chair - the part without chair to support it aches).
DeleteThis makes me sad, but I completely understand. Honestly, I think you have a very healthy perspective about it. A lot of people, self included, would just try to power through it and deal with the pain. But really, what are we doing? I mean, it's great to be healthy and have fun competing every once in a while, but not at the cost of good health. You'll make the right decision.
ReplyDeleteDo what you can,but I hope you keep the blog. I would like to see how your fitness or new hobby evolves from this point.
ReplyDeletehttp://becauseitcalmsmynerves.wordpress.com/
As much as I love running now - and as incomprehensible as the thought of quitting is - I know that this can't go on forever. Based on previous experience, I know that I am very injury prone and slow to heal. So I've just decided to enjoy it while I can!
ReplyDeleteFor 4 years I was a Zumba-zealot! I HAD to take those classes. It was like an obsession with me. But then, slowly, I began to realize that I had to find something else. That my Zumba teacher would not always be around and I needed a less other-dependent hobby. This was the catalyst to discovering running - and I know that - as good as it is now - running is not the be-all end-all. That in time I may "discover" another thing that I love even more. Heck, I got on a bike for the first time in 2 decades last month, and thoroughly enjoyed it! So who knows!
I agree with Jim. You have a very healthy attitude! I would love for you to keep up the blog because I am nosey (ha!) but blogging benefits come and go as well. Just follow your heart and above all - stay healthy!!
Wow, bummer to read this post. Though I know how much trouble you have had with injuries recently. And you know my story too - tried to train for races, got injured, and then seemingly the quest to be completely healthy continues. I will say that recently I've finally started to feel better, I feel almost no pain now doing activities. I have tried to concentrate on not over striding and trying to actually land on the midfoot while running. So I might have turned a corner recently. I also started taking glucosamine, not sure if it helps or not, but it can't hurt.
ReplyDeleteI've thought about trying to play more tennis again, do you like tennis? I've been watching it a ton, started to realize that I might want to try playing it again. Or what about taking classes at your gym? My gym has tons of classes - from kickboxing, yoga, etc. I've also realized that as much as I like running, it is one activity to stay fit - that can be really tough on the body if you do it too much with incorrect form (as I was likely doing before)
Hugs Gracie! This makes me sad as I know how much you have enjoyed running and good you are at it. Triathlons are expensive but I agree that maybe that would be a good option because you would still get to run some (and maybe the biking and swimming would help with whatever is causing the leg pain) No matter what, I am so sorry you are dealing with pain and frustration and hope you find a path that makes you feel good inside and out.
ReplyDeleteI feel your pain about running pain. I have been a devoted runner for 10+ years and this year has beaten me to death. I have had on injury after another and can't seem to be able to run without constant chin pain and having to to an ice bath for my feet. No matter what shoes I try it just wont go away. It sure can suck the fun out of running! I wouldn't do ballet, they have tons of injuries there too!
ReplyDeleteIf you com up with a new hobby let me know because I may be looking for a new one too!
Hmm...this is a very personal decision, really. I certainly agree that there's no reason to continue with an activity that leaves you in pain, and concerned for the longevity of your athletic career. I'm sort of new-ish here, though, so am curious about what you've tried besides going to an MD.
ReplyDeleteHave you been to PT, or tried working with a (good, reliable, well-recommended, safety-conscious) personal trainer? You may have some muscle imbalance that is causing tension or unequal stress on certain parts of your leg. The doctor can rule out broken bones and the like, but may not be so experienced dealing with muscular issues. Have you regularly worked with a certified, experienced yoga or pilates instructor? Many times these folks are much more in tune with ALL the body parts (not just the ones that break), and may help you identify some points of tightness that are throwing off other parts of your body. Have you had an ergonomics professional (I don't actually know what he/she would be called), or even a physical therapist, watch you while you work? You have a very active profession, and you may have some habits from work (posture, etc.) that are exacerbating leg/hip/back issues. Anyway - if you aren't sure about abandoning running completely, those are a few avenues to explore.
As far as other sports...I echo Sweatykid's questions: What exactly do you want from a sport (meditative quiet, teammates, camaraderie, competition, etc.)? How much time do you want it to take? What are your primary goals for exercise (and, by extension, what kind of exercises will help you meet those?)?
Whatever you choose...I hope your body feels happier with your decision, and you enjoy the variety. :)
Oh......this makes me so sad...I am behind on blog reading...I agree with Jim here....health is important???this should not be so hard and painful ...or a source of constant negativity I am so sorry....I would try and see someone else before making a decision ...
ReplyDelete