A day in the life...

Work has been insane. Have I mentioned this? Here's a sample of crazy just from today:

- I call the pediatrician on a child's iron supplement dose. The baby is under 2 years and the dose is roughly four times an adult dose. The NON-MEDICAL PERSONNEL receptionist who answers the phone authorizes the dose. I ask her to let me speak to a nurse or doctor and she refuses, telling me that she's allowed to speak for the doctor, and that's the dose, period.
- A customer asks me if there is anything over the counter for scabies. I tell him no; he tells me he doesn't have insurance so I recommend an inexpensive clinic nearby. He returns in an hour and literally shakes his fist in my face, hissing that he is furious with me. I ask him what's wrong and he replies that he spent $300 on a clinic visit (yeah, didn't follow my advice on the clinic) and that the doctor told him the drug was over the counter so he wasted his money. I look at his prescriptions; he has two prescription-only drugs. I cheerfully fill his prescriptions, despite the fact that he actually really shook his fist in my face. I am not sure who said permethrine 5% and Vistaril were over the counter but um, they aren't.
- I call a doctor's office to get the strength on a prescription.His nurse tells me they are too busy to take my call and will call me later. I tell her the patient had oral surgery and needs this pain medication now. She tells me she'll call when she has a chance. She calls me 6 hours later. For 4 of those hours the patient sat in my waiting room, whimpering softly and bleeding on the floor.
- I am filling a prescription for Bactrim, an oral antibiotic, when I see that the patient has a sulfa allergy. Bactrim is a sulfa drug. I call her doctor about the allergy, and I'm told that the rx (which is typed) should be for Bactroban, a topical antibacterial ointment. I have no idea how this happened (the directions were to take twice a day by mouth - clearly this was not for a cream) but if it hadn't been for the allergy I would never have caught the mistake.
- A customer calls in his own prescription over the phone - ie, a forgery for a controlled substance. Then he's stupid enough to call me right back, this time as the patient, not pretending to be the doctor, and uses the same voice. "Is my prescription ready? My doctor just called it in." DUMB.
- A nineteen year old is discharged after a kidney transplant and brings in his prescriptions. Because he's a transplant patient, he has Medicare. His prescription insurance (medicare part D) says to bill part B because he's a transplant patient and part B covers transplant drugs. Only his drugs aren't all on the covered drugs list by medicare B. So neither medicare is paying and there is no substitute for his drugs and this poor kid is weak and ill and broke.
- A man throws up in the waiting room. In the ensuing drama, a woman grabs her rx from the counter where we are ringing her up and runs out without paying. Her copay was $3.
- Eleven of our top twenty drugs are on manufacture back-order. ELEVEN. No one can get their drugs and they don't understand that it isn't my fault and I'm trying to help. Try explaining this scenario 180 times a day.

Where is my alcoholic beverage???